"You're going out today?" Kate asked her voice sounding whiny as she eyed Zac. "It's our anniversary and you promised me no band stuff."
"But you know how Taylor gets," Zac spoke as he looked at his wife, not even feeling guilty that he was lying to her. He had no intentions of meeting Taylor. No, Louis had called him this morning and asked if they could meet up somewhere for lunch.
Zac knew what the lunch would be about though. Louis was going to tell him how well his video with Harry had done on the website and then Louis would tell him when his next scene would be and who it would be with. The only thing Zac hoped didn't come up during their conversation was Harry, well besides telling him how well the video had done. Zac just didn't want to talk about him, it had been five days since the bathroom blow job and since then he had sort of just made it up in his mind that he'd avoid Harry at all costs and if he went back to Jacob he went back, even if Zac knew that would be a mistake because Harry deserved someone who treated him like an equal.
But Zac just wasn't sure he could continue being Harry's fake boyfriend, not if just one night as the pretend boyfriend had ended up with him in the bathroom getting head from Harry. He wasn't gay and he couldn't give in to the urges his body wanted. He was a loving husband and he was straight, he had liked women all his life and surely if he were gay he wouldn't just be realizing it now.
At that last thought though his mind went to Carrick but no, that had just been a crush, a crush that straight men were allowed to have once in awhile. Zac knew though there was a difference between his crush on Carrick and what his body wanted from Harry. For one he had never wanted Carrick sexually, he may have wanted to try kissing him just to see but he had never fantasized about Carrick's dick inside of him but then again he had never really been intimate with Carrick where as Harry had now sucked his dick twice.
Maybe the key to all of this was in the fact that he had given his body sexually to Harry and...and...no he refused to even think about that thought, that maybe he should just experiment with other men too, because wouldn't he be doing enough experiment with the other boys on Louis' website? But they were work people and maybe he just needed someone outside of work, someone who was completely oblivious to the porn or Zac's own inner turmoil, a one night stand.
"I do know how Taylor gets," Kate said her voice bringing Zac out of his thoughts. "It's one reason why I hate him," she shook her head as she stood from the table where she had been eating her brunch. "But go...I know if you don't he'll be pissed off, but don't take too long. It's our anniversary and your mom is watching the kids and we have all day to ourselves."
Zac forced a smile at his wife's words because a part of him did feel guilty and as he stood from the table he walked over to her, kissing her cheek softly. "I love you," he said as he pulled away and it was the first time he said those words lately that he had some doubts on if he meant them.
If he really loved Kate would he be cheating on her so easily?
"I love you too," Kate smiled but Zac watched as her smile didn't quite reach her eyes and he felt a piece of him getting chipped away. For the past year whenever she said those words and smiled it seemed like she never meant them because her smile only went to her lips, never her eyes.
Though Zac wasn't one to ever question her on it and he didn't today, instead he just turned his back on her and left the kitchen and then the house so that he could go and meet Louis for lunch.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Arriving at the Taco Bueno where he had agreed to meet Louis, Zac parked his truck and as he got out he saw that Louis' car was already here and he hoped that he hadn't made the other man wait too long, Zac always did hate making people wait but maybe that was because Kate always scolded him about making her wait and so now he just felt horrible doing it in general.
Making his way inside he spotted Louis in line to order and he breathed a sigh of relief, joining behind him. "Sorry I kept you waiting," he apologized and he couldn't help but laugh when Louis jumped slightly but turned to face him.
"God damn you're just like Harry, sneaking up on people," Louis teased as he shook his head. "And I wasn't waiting that long. Got here not long before you did actually," he continued as he turned once the person in front of him got done ordering their food.
Zac couldn't help but laugh again and he went silent as Louis moved up in line to order and then after Louis ordered it was his turn and they both stayed silent until they found a table to sit down at.
"So...you have stuff to tell me?" Zac questioned, finally breaking the ice in between bites of his food.
Louis nodded his head, some hair getting into his eyes when he looked up at Zac, "Your first video was a success," he revealed as he smiled. Zac had to admit he wanted to smile too because he did get some satisfaction from that. "The men and a few women went wild for you. Liked how innocent and shy you seemed at first and then how you just opened up for Harry."
Hearing Louis say the last line, Zac couldn't help but blush because his mind went places, a lot of places to be exact..like literally opening up for him with Harry inside....but no he had to stop that idea before he got hard.
"I actually did a poll to see who the viewers wanted your next scene to be with," Louis continued in Zac's silence. "I wasn't surprised in the least when Harry won by a landslide. Now usually I don't like filming two couples back to back but I do like pleasing my viewers so I will give them what they want."
Zac who had been mid bite, started to cough as he heard Louis' words, "My next scene is with Harry again?"
"Is there a problem with that?" Louis asked his eyes questioning Zac. "Harry almost had the same reaction as you and I would hope things aren't strained between you, especially since you're helping him with the Jacob issue."
When Louis brought up the Jacob issue Zac heaved a sigh. He hadn't meant to tell Louis but he had needed to know how to find the bowling alley and then somehow eventually after getting that information from him he had spilled everything. He had just spilled everything to Louis and surprisingly Louis had been okay with it because as it turned out, he hadn't liked Jacob much at all because he too like Zac saw that Jacob treated Harry like a child he could boss around.
"No problem," Zac finally spoke as he shook his head. "Just I guess things are kind of complicated," he explained not sure if he should tell Louis about the bathroom blowjob or even his own inner conflict that was the real reason for all the complications he had in regards to Harry and if Louis had said Harry had the same reaction then maybe Harry knew or could sense how conflicted Zac was, then again Zac was sure he had made it somewhat clear by saying he was straight and then asking Harry to suck his cock after telling him that he had fantasized about being fucked by him and claiming that he had wanted it.
Louis nodded and Zac couldn't help but think he didn't look entirely convinced, but in the end Zac knew he couldn't tell Louis the reason things were complicated.
"Well hopefully things work themselves out," Louis spoke as he gave Zac a smile. "Your next scene with Harry will be tomorrow night and it's going to be a scene of you two in the sixty-nine position. Still kind of want to keep things light with you, not sure yet if I'm ready for you to do other things."
At Louis' words Zac looked down almost feeling thankful because while he did want to experiment, he wasn't sure he was ready for other things either nor did he want to have his first time with those other things be on camera which meant he'd have to hurry up and find some other dude to mess around with if he wanted to find out if he was indeed gay or if his body was just gay for Harry.
After things fell silent between him and Louis things stayed silent for the remainder of lunch and they only got broken when Zac and Louis had headed outside. "You know," Louis spoke which made Zac stop his journey to his car. "You should really join us on our outing tonight. Going to this gay club..it's one Niall found so it's probably not that good but Jacob will be there...and have the opportunity to be alone with Harry."
Swallowing hard Zac took a deep breath because he wasn't sure he could go anywhere tonight. It was still his anniversary and while he had lied to Kate this afternoon he wasn't sure he could lie to her again in one day.
"I'll think about it," Zac sighed not even sure if Louis heard him. After he said that though, he finished the walk to his car. Getting in he started it up and drove home. Home to a woman who he was contemplating leaving again on their anniversary.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"F....fuck Zac," Kate groaned out as she rode her husband's cock, her head falling back slightly.
As Kate's head fell back, Zac sat up, pulling Kate closer to him and kissing the skin on her neck, "So gorgeous," he muttered onto her skin, as he let his hands rest on her hips and he slowed her movements down some. "So so gorgeous," he repeated as he closed his eyes and the moment he did he instantly regretted it because he was filled with images of himself being in Kate's position and on the cock of a man, a man with green eyes and long hair and legs for days.
Opening his eyes again he sighed softly knowing that, that hadn't been the first time tonight he had envisioned Harry while making love to his wife and he knew it was wrong and that it wasn't helping things, well not emotionally but it was helping him to stay hard and continue this sexual act with his wife. An act that she initiated after they had came back from having a dinner at some fancy restaurant he had made reservations at in the beginning of May.
"You're so sexy too Zac," Kate muttered as her movements slowed thanks to Zac and she raised her head again, leaning in to kiss him as her arms went around his neck. "Love you so much," she muttered into his mouth.
"Love you too," Zac whispered back as he closed his eyes again and again images of Harry wrecked his brain as he kissed his wife back but the images of Harry pounding into him as his own body wrapped around Harry's much like Kate's body was wrapped around his was enough to propel Zac's movements to match his wife and he moaned out, his teeth sinking into her bottom lip as he finally came inside of her.
It was after he came that he pulled away from the kiss and he let his head rest inside of Kate's neck as he kept moving with her until she too reached her own end and it was then that he fell back down against the bed again and he smiled as Kate fell down beside him. Her breathing sounding just as labored as his was.
"I think you wore me out Zachary," Kate laughed and Zac opened his eyes to look over at her. "I don't think our sex has been that good in so long."
When Kate said her last statement Zac couldn't help but feel the sting of her words but he ignored them, "I think our sex is always good," he pouted as he leaned over to peck her lips slightly. "So I don't see why you are complaining," he muttered before slipping out of bed.
"Where are you going?" Kate asked as she sat up in their bed, pulling a sheet around her naked body. "And I wasn't complaining, just stating a fact Zachary. Like I do when I call you out on what you eat or how much weight you've gained. I love you but I also like being honest with you."
Zac bit his lip at her words because he wanted to tell her that no, she wasn't being honest with him, that she was being hurtful and sometimes she treated him as if he was her child instead of her husband. "Just going to get a shower," he smiled at her, though it wasn't genuine. "I'll be back after," he told her as he turned to leave the bedroom.
Once he had left the bedroom he headed down the hall and towards the bathroom where he went inside and closed the door. Walking to the shower he turned it on and stepped in once it was just right.
Reaching for the body wash and the red poof thingy that he was sure was Kate's he began to scrub at his body, doing anything to wash away the smell of sex from his body as well as literally trying to cleanse himself of the images and feelings that had plagued his mind because they had made him feel the most dirty if he was being honest. The thoughts of being fucked or making love to Harry had been wrong, especially since he had been with his wife of all people and on their anniversary.
"I'm straight," he told himself as he bit his lip. "I'm straight," he repeated as he scrubbed at his skin a bit harder. "I have to be straight," he finally said as he thought about his life and his family. If he wasn't straight it would ruin everything. His parents and some of his siblings weren't too open minded and his own wife would lash out and probably take the children..and god how could he ever explain that to the children. Junia and Abe may have been a bit too young to understand much but Shepherd was at the age were things made more sense now and he'd question it the most.
"I'm not gay," Zac spoke again as he swallowed hard because saying that felt just a tiny bit wrong, it felt even more wrong than claiming he was straight after everything that had happened.
Once he felt his body was sufficiently clean, Zac washed his hair quickly and then stepped out of the shower, turning it off before grabbing a towel and drying off. After he was dry, he wrapped the towel around his body and walked back to his bedroom, stopping in the doorway as he found Kate passed out on their bed.
Smiling slightly he walked to the bed and sat down on the ledge as he picked up his cell phone to check for any messages from his mom on how the kids were doing. Not seeing any from his mom he breathed a sigh of relief though maybe that had been too soon because as he scrolled through his messages he stopped on one Louis had sent ten minutes ago.
You coming out with us tonight?-Lou
Zac bit his lip harshly as he looked at the message and then over at his sleeping wife, contemplating what to do. Go to the gay club to help Harry out or stay in with his wife.
"But you know how Taylor gets," Zac spoke as he looked at his wife, not even feeling guilty that he was lying to her. He had no intentions of meeting Taylor. No, Louis had called him this morning and asked if they could meet up somewhere for lunch.
Zac knew what the lunch would be about though. Louis was going to tell him how well his video with Harry had done on the website and then Louis would tell him when his next scene would be and who it would be with. The only thing Zac hoped didn't come up during their conversation was Harry, well besides telling him how well the video had done. Zac just didn't want to talk about him, it had been five days since the bathroom blow job and since then he had sort of just made it up in his mind that he'd avoid Harry at all costs and if he went back to Jacob he went back, even if Zac knew that would be a mistake because Harry deserved someone who treated him like an equal.
But Zac just wasn't sure he could continue being Harry's fake boyfriend, not if just one night as the pretend boyfriend had ended up with him in the bathroom getting head from Harry. He wasn't gay and he couldn't give in to the urges his body wanted. He was a loving husband and he was straight, he had liked women all his life and surely if he were gay he wouldn't just be realizing it now.
At that last thought though his mind went to Carrick but no, that had just been a crush, a crush that straight men were allowed to have once in awhile. Zac knew though there was a difference between his crush on Carrick and what his body wanted from Harry. For one he had never wanted Carrick sexually, he may have wanted to try kissing him just to see but he had never fantasized about Carrick's dick inside of him but then again he had never really been intimate with Carrick where as Harry had now sucked his dick twice.
Maybe the key to all of this was in the fact that he had given his body sexually to Harry and...and...no he refused to even think about that thought, that maybe he should just experiment with other men too, because wouldn't he be doing enough experiment with the other boys on Louis' website? But they were work people and maybe he just needed someone outside of work, someone who was completely oblivious to the porn or Zac's own inner turmoil, a one night stand.
"I do know how Taylor gets," Kate said her voice bringing Zac out of his thoughts. "It's one reason why I hate him," she shook her head as she stood from the table where she had been eating her brunch. "But go...I know if you don't he'll be pissed off, but don't take too long. It's our anniversary and your mom is watching the kids and we have all day to ourselves."
Zac forced a smile at his wife's words because a part of him did feel guilty and as he stood from the table he walked over to her, kissing her cheek softly. "I love you," he said as he pulled away and it was the first time he said those words lately that he had some doubts on if he meant them.
If he really loved Kate would he be cheating on her so easily?
"I love you too," Kate smiled but Zac watched as her smile didn't quite reach her eyes and he felt a piece of him getting chipped away. For the past year whenever she said those words and smiled it seemed like she never meant them because her smile only went to her lips, never her eyes.
Though Zac wasn't one to ever question her on it and he didn't today, instead he just turned his back on her and left the kitchen and then the house so that he could go and meet Louis for lunch.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Arriving at the Taco Bueno where he had agreed to meet Louis, Zac parked his truck and as he got out he saw that Louis' car was already here and he hoped that he hadn't made the other man wait too long, Zac always did hate making people wait but maybe that was because Kate always scolded him about making her wait and so now he just felt horrible doing it in general.
Making his way inside he spotted Louis in line to order and he breathed a sigh of relief, joining behind him. "Sorry I kept you waiting," he apologized and he couldn't help but laugh when Louis jumped slightly but turned to face him.
"God damn you're just like Harry, sneaking up on people," Louis teased as he shook his head. "And I wasn't waiting that long. Got here not long before you did actually," he continued as he turned once the person in front of him got done ordering their food.
Zac couldn't help but laugh again and he went silent as Louis moved up in line to order and then after Louis ordered it was his turn and they both stayed silent until they found a table to sit down at.
"So...you have stuff to tell me?" Zac questioned, finally breaking the ice in between bites of his food.
Louis nodded his head, some hair getting into his eyes when he looked up at Zac, "Your first video was a success," he revealed as he smiled. Zac had to admit he wanted to smile too because he did get some satisfaction from that. "The men and a few women went wild for you. Liked how innocent and shy you seemed at first and then how you just opened up for Harry."
Hearing Louis say the last line, Zac couldn't help but blush because his mind went places, a lot of places to be exact..like literally opening up for him with Harry inside....but no he had to stop that idea before he got hard.
"I actually did a poll to see who the viewers wanted your next scene to be with," Louis continued in Zac's silence. "I wasn't surprised in the least when Harry won by a landslide. Now usually I don't like filming two couples back to back but I do like pleasing my viewers so I will give them what they want."
Zac who had been mid bite, started to cough as he heard Louis' words, "My next scene is with Harry again?"
"Is there a problem with that?" Louis asked his eyes questioning Zac. "Harry almost had the same reaction as you and I would hope things aren't strained between you, especially since you're helping him with the Jacob issue."
When Louis brought up the Jacob issue Zac heaved a sigh. He hadn't meant to tell Louis but he had needed to know how to find the bowling alley and then somehow eventually after getting that information from him he had spilled everything. He had just spilled everything to Louis and surprisingly Louis had been okay with it because as it turned out, he hadn't liked Jacob much at all because he too like Zac saw that Jacob treated Harry like a child he could boss around.
"No problem," Zac finally spoke as he shook his head. "Just I guess things are kind of complicated," he explained not sure if he should tell Louis about the bathroom blowjob or even his own inner conflict that was the real reason for all the complications he had in regards to Harry and if Louis had said Harry had the same reaction then maybe Harry knew or could sense how conflicted Zac was, then again Zac was sure he had made it somewhat clear by saying he was straight and then asking Harry to suck his cock after telling him that he had fantasized about being fucked by him and claiming that he had wanted it.
Louis nodded and Zac couldn't help but think he didn't look entirely convinced, but in the end Zac knew he couldn't tell Louis the reason things were complicated.
"Well hopefully things work themselves out," Louis spoke as he gave Zac a smile. "Your next scene with Harry will be tomorrow night and it's going to be a scene of you two in the sixty-nine position. Still kind of want to keep things light with you, not sure yet if I'm ready for you to do other things."
At Louis' words Zac looked down almost feeling thankful because while he did want to experiment, he wasn't sure he was ready for other things either nor did he want to have his first time with those other things be on camera which meant he'd have to hurry up and find some other dude to mess around with if he wanted to find out if he was indeed gay or if his body was just gay for Harry.
After things fell silent between him and Louis things stayed silent for the remainder of lunch and they only got broken when Zac and Louis had headed outside. "You know," Louis spoke which made Zac stop his journey to his car. "You should really join us on our outing tonight. Going to this gay club..it's one Niall found so it's probably not that good but Jacob will be there...and have the opportunity to be alone with Harry."
Swallowing hard Zac took a deep breath because he wasn't sure he could go anywhere tonight. It was still his anniversary and while he had lied to Kate this afternoon he wasn't sure he could lie to her again in one day.
"I'll think about it," Zac sighed not even sure if Louis heard him. After he said that though, he finished the walk to his car. Getting in he started it up and drove home. Home to a woman who he was contemplating leaving again on their anniversary.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"F....fuck Zac," Kate groaned out as she rode her husband's cock, her head falling back slightly.
As Kate's head fell back, Zac sat up, pulling Kate closer to him and kissing the skin on her neck, "So gorgeous," he muttered onto her skin, as he let his hands rest on her hips and he slowed her movements down some. "So so gorgeous," he repeated as he closed his eyes and the moment he did he instantly regretted it because he was filled with images of himself being in Kate's position and on the cock of a man, a man with green eyes and long hair and legs for days.
Opening his eyes again he sighed softly knowing that, that hadn't been the first time tonight he had envisioned Harry while making love to his wife and he knew it was wrong and that it wasn't helping things, well not emotionally but it was helping him to stay hard and continue this sexual act with his wife. An act that she initiated after they had came back from having a dinner at some fancy restaurant he had made reservations at in the beginning of May.
"You're so sexy too Zac," Kate muttered as her movements slowed thanks to Zac and she raised her head again, leaning in to kiss him as her arms went around his neck. "Love you so much," she muttered into his mouth.
"Love you too," Zac whispered back as he closed his eyes again and again images of Harry wrecked his brain as he kissed his wife back but the images of Harry pounding into him as his own body wrapped around Harry's much like Kate's body was wrapped around his was enough to propel Zac's movements to match his wife and he moaned out, his teeth sinking into her bottom lip as he finally came inside of her.
It was after he came that he pulled away from the kiss and he let his head rest inside of Kate's neck as he kept moving with her until she too reached her own end and it was then that he fell back down against the bed again and he smiled as Kate fell down beside him. Her breathing sounding just as labored as his was.
"I think you wore me out Zachary," Kate laughed and Zac opened his eyes to look over at her. "I don't think our sex has been that good in so long."
When Kate said her last statement Zac couldn't help but feel the sting of her words but he ignored them, "I think our sex is always good," he pouted as he leaned over to peck her lips slightly. "So I don't see why you are complaining," he muttered before slipping out of bed.
"Where are you going?" Kate asked as she sat up in their bed, pulling a sheet around her naked body. "And I wasn't complaining, just stating a fact Zachary. Like I do when I call you out on what you eat or how much weight you've gained. I love you but I also like being honest with you."
Zac bit his lip at her words because he wanted to tell her that no, she wasn't being honest with him, that she was being hurtful and sometimes she treated him as if he was her child instead of her husband. "Just going to get a shower," he smiled at her, though it wasn't genuine. "I'll be back after," he told her as he turned to leave the bedroom.
Once he had left the bedroom he headed down the hall and towards the bathroom where he went inside and closed the door. Walking to the shower he turned it on and stepped in once it was just right.
Reaching for the body wash and the red poof thingy that he was sure was Kate's he began to scrub at his body, doing anything to wash away the smell of sex from his body as well as literally trying to cleanse himself of the images and feelings that had plagued his mind because they had made him feel the most dirty if he was being honest. The thoughts of being fucked or making love to Harry had been wrong, especially since he had been with his wife of all people and on their anniversary.
"I'm straight," he told himself as he bit his lip. "I'm straight," he repeated as he scrubbed at his skin a bit harder. "I have to be straight," he finally said as he thought about his life and his family. If he wasn't straight it would ruin everything. His parents and some of his siblings weren't too open minded and his own wife would lash out and probably take the children..and god how could he ever explain that to the children. Junia and Abe may have been a bit too young to understand much but Shepherd was at the age were things made more sense now and he'd question it the most.
"I'm not gay," Zac spoke again as he swallowed hard because saying that felt just a tiny bit wrong, it felt even more wrong than claiming he was straight after everything that had happened.
Once he felt his body was sufficiently clean, Zac washed his hair quickly and then stepped out of the shower, turning it off before grabbing a towel and drying off. After he was dry, he wrapped the towel around his body and walked back to his bedroom, stopping in the doorway as he found Kate passed out on their bed.
Smiling slightly he walked to the bed and sat down on the ledge as he picked up his cell phone to check for any messages from his mom on how the kids were doing. Not seeing any from his mom he breathed a sigh of relief though maybe that had been too soon because as he scrolled through his messages he stopped on one Louis had sent ten minutes ago.
You coming out with us tonight?-Lou
Zac bit his lip harshly as he looked at the message and then over at his sleeping wife, contemplating what to do. Go to the gay club to help Harry out or stay in with his wife.